Jesus, son of Mary fucking Magdalene and God our Lord and Savoiur, the enemy of Dark Lord Hades, Christ



sicknessinsalvation:

genderterrorist:

OH MY GOD

THE LAST FUCKING PANEL

rebuy:

glue is just skins but not called skins??

author: she didn't want to eat dinner because she doesn't like chicken noodle soup
english teacher: even though it doesn't say it, we can infer that 17 years ago she encountered an attack from chickens while on a trip to africa visiting her great aunt who was dying from pneumonia which she got from chickens that were being harvested for the great feast
tumblr: lol fukin stupid teacher
loki: blinks
tumblr: do you see this? do you see that blink? that fucking blink. it shows how much pain he has inside of him. look at him. all he wants is his father to love him. look at the tears that he is holding back. he's never been the favorite son, he always knew that he didn't belong. this is the fucking blink that makes me love loki. he's not a villain. he's just a scared, lonely child.
author: she didn't want to eat dinner because she doesn't like chicken noodle soup
english teacher: even though it doesn't say it, we can infer that 17 years ago she encountered an attack from chickens while on a trip to africa visiting her great aunt who was dying from pneumonia which she got from chickens that were being harvested for the great feast
tumblr: lol fukin stupid teacher
loki: blinks
tumblr: do you see this? do you see that blink? that fucking blink. it shows how much pain he has inside of him. look at him. all he wants is his father to love him. look at the tears that he is holding back. he's never been the favorite son, he always knew that he didn't belong. this is the fucking blink that makes me love loki. he's not a villain. he's just a scared, lonely child.

hyuugasaki:

story about a dude that rejected by a hot girl and the movie shows him trying to win her over and at the end it turns out the hot girl is a lesbian and she had a crush on this chubby girl the dude totally rudely rejected earlier and the two super cute girls smooch and the dude cries and no one gives a shit

appendingfic:


ironcheflancaster:

wedonotpromoteviolence:

heirofspacecore:

sleek-black-wings:

thederpywingedone:

batmansymbol:

by the way did I ever tell y’all about the time I got a blank message from nobody, sent on new year’s eve in 1969, when the internet didn’t exist?
because that happened

What the fuck

Time travel.

Or maybe its from 2069, when we’ve developed the technology to send data to the past. You sent yourself a blank message as a test but as the email address you used to send it doesnt exist yet, it came up as no sender

I… what?

OKAY KIDS, LET’S LEARN ABOUT THE UNIX EPOCH
So back in the early days of computers, when we were trying to build clocks to keep all our computers in sync, we tried a bunch of different ways to synchronize them in ways that both normal people could use and programmers could utilize.
We just tried saying “The current time is THIS date” and just storing that date as some text, but while that was easy for humans, it was a bunch of different numbers that worked together in funny ways and computers don’t play nice with a bunch of random, arbitrary rules.
Not much worked, until we realized that we needed a BASELINE to compare against, and a way to represent the current time that covers everybody. So we came up with Unix time, because Unix was the style at the time. Essentially, Unix time represents any given time by saying “How many seconds ago was 12:00 AM on January 1, 1970 in Iceland somewhere?”. Recent enough to keep the numbers relatively small, far enough that nothing computer-y would fall before it, and consistent enough that there’d be no discrepancy based on where you are.
So what happens when you see the date “December 31, 1969” on a buggy message like this is that the computer received a bunch of zeroes by mistake and went “Oh, this must be a message!” Then when it tried to interpret it, it got to the date, found a zero, and said “Zero seconds since the Unix Epoch? I’ll round down - this was sent at the last second of New Year’s Eve, 1969! They’ll be so happy to finally get their blank message.”
And then the computer traipsed off on its merry way, because computers are fucking ridiculous.

This is frankly more hilarious than the 1969 time traveler theory

appendingfic:

ironcheflancaster:

wedonotpromoteviolence:

heirofspacecore:

sleek-black-wings:

thederpywingedone:

batmansymbol:

by the way did I ever tell y’all about the time I got a blank message from nobody, sent on new year’s eve in 1969, when the internet didn’t exist?

because that happened

What the fuck

Time travel.

Or maybe its from 2069, when we’ve developed the technology to send data to the past. You sent yourself a blank message as a test but as the email address you used to send it doesnt exist yet, it came up as no sender

I… what?

OKAY KIDS, LET’S LEARN ABOUT THE UNIX EPOCH

So back in the early days of computers, when we were trying to build clocks to keep all our computers in sync, we tried a bunch of different ways to synchronize them in ways that both normal people could use and programmers could utilize.

We just tried saying “The current time is THIS date” and just storing that date as some text, but while that was easy for humans, it was a bunch of different numbers that worked together in funny ways and computers don’t play nice with a bunch of random, arbitrary rules.

Not much worked, until we realized that we needed a BASELINE to compare against, and a way to represent the current time that covers everybody. So we came up with Unix time, because Unix was the style at the time. Essentially, Unix time represents any given time by saying “How many seconds ago was 12:00 AM on January 1, 1970 in Iceland somewhere?”. Recent enough to keep the numbers relatively small, far enough that nothing computer-y would fall before it, and consistent enough that there’d be no discrepancy based on where you are.

So what happens when you see the date “December 31, 1969” on a buggy message like this is that the computer received a bunch of zeroes by mistake and went “Oh, this must be a message!” Then when it tried to interpret it, it got to the date, found a zero, and said “Zero seconds since the Unix Epoch? I’ll round down - this was sent at the last second of New Year’s Eve, 1969! They’ll be so happy to finally get their blank message.”

And then the computer traipsed off on its merry way, because computers are fucking ridiculous.

This is frankly more hilarious than the 1969 time traveler theory

sandrino-partyoffive:

mattmcguigan:


mattmcguigan:

how to make friends


I am both of them.

sandrino-partyoffive:

mattmcguigan:

mattmcguigan:

how to make friends

I am both of them.

This is gonna sound so stupid but what is a fuckboy? lol
Anonym

rememberingsuunday:

fuckboy symptoms:

  • timothy over here askin’ for nudes when all u did was say hello
  • connor who won’t calm down with his axe spray tryna infect ya lungs
  • colin adding #420 to his bio when he smoked weed one time
  • gregory mad cause u didn’t blow him after the first date

how to spot a fuckboy:

  • white nike tube socks with his adidas sandals
  • he wants to play 20 questions (!!!!!!!!! do not play !!!!!!!!!!! especially if there’s a “;)” involved)
  • relies on his mom but doesn’t respect women
  • looks like he just read one of jaden smith’s tweets in all of his selfies
  • can’t find the clitoris

fuckboys come in all shapes and sizes and results may vary but when he a fuckboy…he a fuckboy…and u will know

ink-and-roses:

ahumblebard:

doxian:

I want a movie about a little girl, aged like 11-12, going through the stuggles of prepubescent girl life, with her entire inner monologue is narrated by Samuel L. Jackson.

Shot of disgruntled adorable little girl.

SLJ: I knew that Susie was a backstabbin’ motherfucker, and if anyone was going to ruin my chances of being Miss Sugar Drop Queen, it was that asshole. 

I didn’t know I needed this in my life until now.

This is never not funny

theme